Favorite foods

Let’s talk about food. This is a gastric weight loss blog after all and food is an integral part of life.
Food is a wonderful thing. Beautiful in its tastes and looks…how it makes you feel to chew that gooey brownie or bite into a perfectly sautéed brussels sprouts…just thinking about it makes me hungry. Let’s get back on topic.  I want to talk to you about my favorite healthy and unhealthy food. Why? Because I think that favorite foods speak a lot about whom a person is and what they seek when they gravitate towards that food. Didn’t realize it was that deep? Well I can be. Imagine that every time you cried, your mom gave you piece of chocolate and cuddled you till you stopped crying. From that point on, you would remember the feeling of being safe and loved while eating chocolate. True, that’s a simplistic take on things, but you get my drift.
My favorite healthy food (one of them anyways) has got to be brussels sprouts. (Aren’t they pretty?)


Sautéed, roasted, steamed…really anyway you can think to cook them; I’m going to eat them. Something about the shape and the taste of them just makes me smile. Covered in cheese…it’s all good. But I think I like them best roasted with a bit of salt and olive oil. They get crunchy on the outside and still soft on the inside. To be honest, I didn’t really have them until I became an adult, so there are no childhood memories of them, but the memories I do have of eating them now are good and happy.


While we are talking about healthy foods, we must give some credit to unhealthy food. True, it is unhealthy, but if eaten in moderation and respect to what your limit is, there is no reason not to enjoy the food. With that in mind, my most favorite is brownies.
I was going to say chocolate, but I do prefer brownies. I especially love the crunchy bits around the edges.


















A close second is stale peeps (don’t judge),
 but that’s not what we are talking about.




Brownies…so good when they are hot and gooey…ice cream on top. I also like them cold, having been made the day before. There is something about the rich, fudgy nature. I do have childhood memories of brownies. They were special treats, not for the everyday. my mom likes to put nuts in them, but I can eat them either way. It always felt like a prize at the end of the day if there were brownies waiting. They felt decadent, like I had done something great, even if it was just getting to school on time


So…what are some of your favorite healthy and unhealthy foods? Don’t be shy. Let me know and we can talk about the emotions behind them.

Back on the wagon

Let’s go back, shall we?

pre-op 11/29/2011 260 pounds

 

This is how I started this journey. A very enlightening, eye-opening, life changing journey. Along the way, I learned a lot about myself and those around me.

Has it been easy? NO

Has it been worth it? Yes, every minute of it.

Would I do it again? Hell yea!

This journey though is far from over. To be honest, for a while I was acting like it was. I started believing I was done, that I had reached the finish line. That I was “normal”.

What does that even mean?

Anyways, I had to remind myself that I wasn’t done. I have a lot more to do and accomplish. I don’t know what the wake up call was though. Could have been the too small bra…probably.

I just know that I need to get serous again, for me.

Here are today at 175 pounds, looking good, but still not quite at ease. We’ll get there.

What I gained and lost with taking a risk…

I remember the day I went to the doctor and he told me my blood pressure was too high – deathly high. It was not so much a wake up call but a reality check on what my lifestyle was doing to me and my body. At the time of the original diagnosis, gastric bypass was not as advanced. They were still cutting people open and there was little support once you left surgery. Fast forward to 2011, things were MUCH different. There was laparoscopic surgery and a wide support group. There were blogs and recipes and just…so much out there that it made it my head spin. With that, I knew it was time to have the surgery. I wasn’t getting any younger and my body…it was starting to show the strain. So, I took the leap and went to the best bypass surgeon on the west coast. I went to all the classes, did my research and asked all the questions that came to my mind. I needed to be sure that it was the right step for me. I had people in my life who questioned me. They thought it was a cop out, the easy way to get things done. I had people giving me the side eye and whispering under their breaths, telling me about friends who had died or almost died from not eating or eating too much or infection…I had to shut them out. I knew what I was doing and I had the research to back me up. I also knew that it was a risk I needed to take. I couldn’t keep living the life I was in. I needed the change.

I just didn’t realize what I was going to end up paying for this change.

What I gained:

#1– My health. As the weight melted away, my blood pressure dropped, my joints felt better, I could breathe coming up the stairs. Simple things like tying my shoes came easier.

#2 – a sense of relief. Relief that I wasn’t going to stroke out at any moment or wake up with diabetes. Relief that I had broken the cycle of obesity at least a little bit.

#3 – freedom. Not just in my relationship status, but in my whole mentality. I still have habits and things I do that are self-sabotage, but not as bad as before. I am conscious of what I’m doing, how I’m feeling in a moment that would otherwise send me into a tail spin. there is a freedom in not being hostage to my stomach or my emotions. 

What I lost:

#1 – doubt. This is complicated issue, but let me try to break it down. I still have some doubt…all humans do. My doubt is no longer about my weight though. I can’t say that I ever really doubted my self worth, but maybe if I was being realistic about my pride in who I was. Don’t get me wrong…I loved being a big girl. But sometimes under that pride…there was doubt.

#2 – my boobs. Okay…it’s superficial but real. I had breast reduction surgery when I was younger which took me down to a c-cup. Near surgery time, I was back up to a d-cup.  After that…deflation back down to a c-cup…nearly a b-cup. I just…want big boobs again. What is wrong with that?

#3 – my willingness to settle. Once the weight left, so did my complacency with where I was in life. Some people see it as a problem, something to work on. I don’t. Why do I need to be content with mediocrity? What is wrong with not wanting the “same ‘ole same ‘ole”? But this is more than just wanting the better things in life. It’s also about not accepting any one else’s crap. I will not stand for being treated shabbily or sit around while someone walks all over me. I’m nice, but firm.

#4 – my filter. I’m not sure why, but as the weight came off, my desire to please others melted with it. Not really sure of the correlation…perhaps it’s more to do with not wanting to be loud and big…anyone else experienced this?

There are other things that I lost and gained but the things I’ve mentioned above…are the most significant.

tell me…what did you lose/gain by taking the risk?