It’s hard to believe that I am one year out from surgery. I had my check up on Nov 29 and was told that I was perfect. Doing well and everything. I just had to shake my head. But really…one whole year has passed since I made the decisions that have changed my life in more than one way. I have to admit that I keep checking myself out in the mirror when I walk by, look at my face from every angle, wondering who the hell is staring back at me. Dr. Snyder was telling me that he wouldn’t have recognized me in the street. Hell, half the time I don’t know me! It’s a weird and wonderful feeling all at the same time. I told him that I like being able to go into the stores for the “skinny” people and not have to only buy the accessories. Oh man, it’s crazy knowing that I can buy just about any piece of clothing in the store if I money were no object, rather than my size holding me back.
I have said it before and I’ll say it again…it’s not about the weight. It was always about the health, but I’m not going to lie and tell you that I don’t like looking as good as I do now. This blog is about the truth and I’m not going to start lying at this point. I like being smaller than I was. there is no shame in admitting it. I loved me big and I love me small. It’s just…people look at you a LOT different when you are 100lbs lighter than before.
Now that I’ve reached my milestone, I need to start setting goals that are not weight related. I made a lot of promises to myself and it’s time I start keeping them.
2 comments:
You are such an inspiration!
I'm considering gastic surgery. I read a year of your blog. I can see that you've really struggled with learning about portions, types of food, protein, etc. I read your struggles and think, "Do I want to do something to my body that will make me vomit for the rest of my life?" "Yes, it's great to be healthy, but is the pay-off worth the misery?" You're at a place now where you have struggled through the learning curve. You've learned how to eat according to your new plumbing. If you knew beforehand what the struggle would be like, would you do it again? I mean really, the pain, the relationships, the hormone swings, the vomiting, the gas/dumping, never having easy food on hand anymore and being forced to cook -- would you go through all that again? Can you say you are happy as a person? You admitted to being somewhat depressed -- do you feel like you've rebounded from that or are you a skinny person that's depressed? I'm just trying to figure out a realistic picture of how worthwhile all this struggle will be? I mean do you live with indigestion all the time? It kind of sounds like it. I don't want to do something to myself that results in indigestion for the rest of my life. Your reflections and thoughts would be appreciated. Feel free to e-mail me if you'd like to answer more privately.
Post a Comment